Mom Days

Scrubbing dishes
Folding clothes
"Mommy, will you blow my nose?"

          Hours spent

          In the kitchen

          Rarely gaining recognition.

Tears of joy

Tears of rage

"Mommy, can I turn the page?"

          Make a mess

          Pick up after

          Feel my heart soar with their laughter.

Tucking in

Time to rest

"Mommy, you are just the best!"

          Hold them close

          Don't let go

          It's a wonder how they grow.

© 2012 M. Kushnerick

Book Review: Stones of Remembrance by Julie Presley

Stones of Remembrance

I just read the first novel I have picked up in a few years.
Cover to cover.
In one day.
Yeah, it was that good!

Julie Presley has done a brilliant job of depicting a heart-wrenching, core-touching story that has so much genuine, down-to-earth reality about the ups and downs of journeying with Jesus and the risky business of Kingdom living. With poise and grace, she takes you into the real sticky aspects of life, from tragic loss to passionate connection.

It seems like so many "Christian" books present this fluffy, happy, cliche idea of what it looks like to go through this life, with its many unexpected twists and turns, as a believer in Jesus. This book is bold and messy and so full of every legitimate emotion known to man. It paints a raw picture of the Father's pursuit of His beloved children and the response of two very real people with very real heartache, doubts, struggles, and grief.

I cried; I gasped; my jaw dropped; my heart raced; I laughed; and at the end I threw my arms in the air and cheered with tears streaming down my face.

I think every woman I know should read this book and pass it on to her girl friends. It isn't every day that such a treasure becomes available to us that is able to unlock longings of love lost and hope regained that we thought would never see daylight again. The practical truth of the dialog found within will make your heart sing a new song and throw you into a frantic run to your Daddy's arms, where He will hold you tight and make you whole.



This book is available as a paperback or as an e-Book on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or directly from Julie's website. I urge you to get ahold of it and let it get ahold of you!

I'm even doing a giveaway of a copy of the e-Book, so you could get it for free! All you have to do is share this review on your Facebook page, Re-Tweet it, or RePin it before midnight Saturday, Sept. 22, to be entered to win.

This is My Life

Exhausting day so far. I swear the most outlandish things happen on the days that I resolve to take a chill pill and choose peace.

On less than 4 hours of sleep, I had to drag the kids out of bed to pick up the hubby from his 16 hour shift at 7am, which makes for an off-kilter day right there. Unable to fully comprehend the world or function like a normal human being (at least, as "normal" as I can pull off...), I somehow managed to get everyone home and fed and back out the door with Kylee in uniform and with backpack in tow (including signed permission slip for next week's field trip; I'm such an overachiever!) to get her to school on time (for the first time all week).

I even got laundry put away and the kitchen floor swept before meeting a beautiful friend for coffee.

The coffee shop we met at is literally 4 doors down from our house, which I absolutely love. The kids call this one "our coffee shop;" I get the impression that they seriously believe it belongs to us... Anyway, I walk down there with my two smallest mini people, thinking I have everything under control and this will be a breeze. Within 15 minutes of being there, my sweet boy used one of the crayons I brought as an attempt at adequate distraction to express his creative soul on the solid yellow wall. It was a black crayon, of course.

I very much enjoyed the luxury of actual adult conversation and interaction, which has been quite lacking for me this week; of course it was intermingled with so many questions and trips to the bathroom and assisting with getting the toys off of the very top shelf and then putting them back, but it was still very cherished, especially with such a wonderful friend and person.

And then, of course, more drama ensued when Chloe and Josiah decided to fight over one particular piece from a toy and Josiah fell off of his chair backwards, head first into the wall/window frame. Everyone in the shop stopped moving and held their breath as my son released a completely legit cry of terror and pain. A few people asked if they could do anything and the poor barista-boy looked so desperate to be of assistance that I asked him for a bag of ice, which he kindly and promptly brought out. Thankfully my boy seems to be fine, just a little bumped and scraped, which is entirely normal for him anyway. It was nice that everyone seemed so concerned for my poor, sweet boy and I even forgot to be embarrassed to bring such (additional) attention to the state of utter chaos my life can tend to become. He was back to curiosity and discovery in a few short minutes, acting like nothing had happened; that's my boy!

We chatted some more and my sweet friend gave me a whole bag full of brand new school uniform clothes for my Kylee, which is a huge help and a totally unexpected blessing! Then we parted ways so I could feed my tiny monsters, whose dispositions were rapidly deteriorating, and she could go home and mow her lawn.

Chloe fell into total fall-apart mode when we got back to the apartment, which helped push Siah over the edge into limp-noodle rebellion. Oh the joys... I managed to feed one and put the emotionally frayed one in her bed to discover the art of calming down so she could get her lunch, then headed back to the coffee shop to scrub the crayon off of the wall and also grab a short stint of peace and calm to gather myself. (Don't worry, Tom is home so I didn't just abandon my kids.)

Thankfully I got all of the crayon off of the wall (hooray for Norwex cloths!), but now there are some very clean patches on an otherwise not-so-clean yellow surface. Oddly, I wasn't flustered or embarrassed by any of this situation either, which I am totally impressed with myself about (if you really know me, you'll understand this isn't pride, it's sober judgment of how much I've grown).

Now every ounce of energy I might have had from my minuscule amount of sleep is completely drained, Chloe has calmed down and eaten and is now in bed resting peacefully, and I am counting my blessings and catching up on some reading.

A nap would sure be nice, but I probably won't even attempt that for fear of starting the whole de-groggifying (I made that word up just now...) process again to go pick Kylee up in an hour and a half.

One Year Ago Today...

Labor Day weekend last year held a monumental day for us.

That Sunday we were asking the Lord for a specific answer as to where He wanted us to go and do. And He answered.

We had been seeking His direction on what He was calling us to for almost a month. This is something that we have always done on at least a semi-annual basis, just to check in, make sure we're still in His will and fully submitted to Him and that our hearts are pure. Until that point these inventories were typically short and simple, consisting of asking the Lord, Him saying, "Stay where you are," us repenting of any pride, resentment, or whatever, then receiving refreshing and renewed vision, joy, and strength.

But this time we got a different answer.

So we were listening more intently and digging deeper.

And on that Sunday we got the answer: "Move to Louisville and join Chris and Hannah Davis at Destiny Church."

It's amazing how much can happen in just one year. How beautiful to be sitting in Louisville now, one year later, walking by faith on the path He called us to.

This is all just the goodness of the Lord!

Praise the Lord, O My Soul

We have been in Louisville for 4 weeks now.

We're pretty well settled into our apartment. The only room I have left with full boxes (other than the boxes of books still awaiting bookshelves) is our bedroom and I've been searching everywhere for my motivation to finish that, with no luck. But we definitely feel at home here.

Now that we've been here a few weeks and are settling in, I am noticing some expectations that I've had for this move and this season of our life that I had sworn I didn't have. I've been through a bit of a cycle of getting frustrated, losing my temper, whining, getting depressed, realizing I'm being ridiculous, repenting, and ruling my soul.

One of the biggest expectations I've had has been expecting this job that Tom had been pursuing to be the answer to all of our financial woes. Boy was I mistaken. Turned out the job is only commission, an independent contractor position, and Tom has to find all of his own leads. So far he has made a grand total of $125 in the 4 weeks we have been here and has spent more than that in gas and supplies. So now he is only doing that part time, hoping that he can get some deals going, and he has started working for pennies as a security officer overnights at a university hospital. Needless to say, I had to swallow my pride and repent, rule my soul and trust my husband and my Lord.

Just like every other period of job hunting and financial struggle, it seems many costly things come up. The Pontiac is out of service for now, having problems with the coolant reservoir. We replaced the reservoir with some help from a friend, but now the coolant is leaking from some yet to be determined location. So we are down to one vehicle until we can get the car looked at. With Kylee starting school we have had to get her uniform clothes, supplies, and now need to buy her new shoes. Then there was the whole me losing my phone thing... And now we are getting to the point that we need to get our Kentucky driver's licenses and register our vehicles and get in-state car insurance. The expenses seem to be piling up and the income is not. Thankfully we were approved for Kylee to receive free breakfast and lunch at school, which is definitely a big help.

But this is all the goodness of the Lord! We did know walking into this that it would be hard and we would be walking by faith. Every day I have to make the choice to not look at the things around me in the physical and trust my heavenly Daddy to take care of me. I'm holding on to the promises I find in His Word that echo in my spirit. One such promise is in Isaiah 26:3 - "You will keep in perfect peace all those who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on You!"

I am resting in that perfect peace, keeping my eyes on Jesus. I am thankful for all of the wonderful gifts the Father has so graciously given and I trust Him to work everything out for our good so that we can continue on His mission here in the Highlands with Destiny Church.

The most rewarding aspect of our time here thus far is building relationships with the beautiful people at Destiny. We are overwhelmed with their joy and love and faith. Every opportunity we have had to get to know each of them more has been greatly cherished. What an incredible blessing to be in fellowship with such amazing brothers and sisters!

So there is a bit of an update for you all. Thank you everyone for all of your prayers, love, support, and encouragement as we continue to serve the Lord and His people in this community.

Here is a short video to make you smile:

1 Corinthians 9:27

Maybe it's the lower altitude, which means more air weighing me down?

Maybe it's the fact that, for the first time in over a year, we are actually drying our clothes in a dryer?

Maybe it's still leftover weight from my last pregnancy that I've been trying to ignore for almost 2 years now?

Or maybe I'm just gaining weight. I don't have a scale to verify that theory, though. (Is there an iPhone app that I can use to weigh myself by standing on my phone??)

Whatever the reason, my clothes seem to be fitting a little more snug than usual. I'm slightly shocked because now we have a million stairs in our home that I climb and descend numerous times a day, we are pretty tight on money so extra snacking is a luxury we can't afford, and my full time job now is to wrangle my children and keep my house in order.

But, alas, my muffin top does not lie.

And so, to Jillian Michaels I turn, with my faithful companion and fellow sufferer by my side. Tom and I blew the dust off of her "The Biggest Winner!" 5-DVD boxed set (that we acquired for free some time ago), strapped on our sneakers, filled our water bottles, and enjoyed a nice, affordable butt-whipping.

Now I don't think I ever want to move again. Perhaps, for Tom's sake, I should take a shower before dragging my beaten bones to bed...

And maybe, just maybe, we will do it all over again tomorrow.

One Week

We've been in Louisville for one week now. We're settling in pretty well. Almost done unpacking, which feels great! We just need some furniture like bookshelves and a desk to finish up.

The apartment is just big enough for the five of us. The girls love their big room that has enough room for sleeping and playing. It's kind of like their own little getaway upstairs. I'm adjusting to not having a dishwasher and only having one bathroom. Tom's man heart is loving all of the little projects he's needed to do. Josiah is finally sleeping in his room, but still hasn't slept in his bed. He's made a habit out of sleeping on his floor against the door. Poor little dude is having the hardest time adjusting.

Tom's job turned out to be different than what we were expecting, but for now he is giving it a try. He seems to be starting out great, which is encouraging. I'll let him tell of what he is doing and how he likes it.

I've had a few moments of being overwhelmed with the house, with the kids, with all of the logistics like getting Kylee set up for school and needing to figure out insurance. Tom has been great about speaking peace and grace over me and helping me where he can. The hardest thing has been Josiah's struggle with adjusting. He has been incredibly clingy and needy. It's completely understandable; this is a big change for such a little guy! Prayers for his dear, sweet heart would be much appreciated. This mama is exhausted! Thankfully there are amazing people in our church family at Destiny who have reached out to help with the kids and who have helped answer my questions about figuring out the logistics. I am more than blessed!

Speaking of Destiny Church: I LOVE being here in person and getting to know these amazing people! Our hearts are near bursting with love and joy for the people the Lord has called us to serve. I am looking forward to being in a more "normal" state in our house so we can have more time and space to connect with them. *happy sigh*



I love living in Louisville! This is such a beautiful city with so much to do. We enjoy living on Bardstown Road and being able to walk to shops and restaurants and even the church building. The people are great and I am even getting used to the very different style of driving. It will take some time for me to learn my way around, but I am so grateful for the Google Maps app on my phone in the meantime! I absolutely love all of the beautiful architecture and the plethora of green foliage here.



The mini people are still amazing. They bring me so much joy! I love that I have all of my time to take care of them and order our household. Kylee is super excited to start school in two weeks Chloe is sad that she doesn't get to start school yet and has assured me that she is happy I get to stay home with her but she is sad Kylee won't be home with her anymore. Josiah, despite all of his clingy-ness and troubles, is still absolutely hilarious. He talks all the time now and is climbing all over everything - including bathroom and kitchen cabinets. It blesses my mama heart that all 3 of them get along so well and dote on each other all day long. I love listening to their chatter and laughter as they play in Siah's room or eat lunch together. My heart is so full.